to be alone, with me,

everyday is a struggle of emotions, being pulled back and forth by what people expect from you and what you expect from yourself. you end up getting to the end of the day and not knowing why you went on such a rollercoaster ride in the first place. also, how did you remain calm when your mind was bursting at the seams, just waiting for the moment to explode? your throat is constricted from words you push back and all you can do is just ... be still and hope that time will run its course and you can be alone again.

to be alone again. I feel like I'm a sufjan steven's song.